Category — LOA

I recently finished reading a book by Joyce Meyer, and I appreciate her no-nonsense approach in making connections between God (Spirit, source, whatever you want to call it) and ourselves.  I received possession of this book when I started out on a business trip, so it was prime time to disconnect from my reality and delve into the words she shared.  In the very first chapter, she introduced a concept that I didn’t quite understand: “You can’t give what you don’t have“.

What am I not getting?

Intellectually, I get it but intuitively I wasn’t sure how this played out. Does she mean me? Other people? All of the above?  How does this apply?  Humbly, I  really didn’t get it. Then the other concept that goes hand in hand that Joyce explained is that most people don’t know how to receive.  Dammit, there it is again – being able to receive.  I have some things going on in my personal life that make me do a double take here.   Law of Attraction talks about it.  And I thought I got it when I learned about it then, but apparently some blockages still persist otherwise I wouldn’t be so confused.  What am I missing (I ask myself as I fly along to my destination)?

As I was going to sleep that night, I prayed for some guidance on what all this really means. And fortunately God delivered. I’ll explain.

Song in my head

The morning I woke up, I had a song in my head.  This happens often. This time it was a song by The Who “Love Reign O’er Me”.  The words..”LOVE…Rain on Me… On Me…On Me… (it’s the end of the song when Roger Daltry really screams it out) was pounding in my head.  Interesting, I thought.  Ironically it happened to rain like a M-F the night before.  It could be a coincidence, but I don’t believe in them.  But still it left me with questions – how do I allow love to “rain on me”?  It is a conscious effort?  Or something deeper at a subconscious level?  Ah, heck, I’ll just go with it. Stop thinking (I say in my head)!

Then it started to happen all on its own.  I start noticing that I’m making deeper connections with people, and I’m noticing a difference in their response.  I began to feel really energized and in general, loving.  Loving towards others.  It just flowed out of me.

Ah…I think. Perhaps I was not able to offer this before because I technically didn’t “HAVE” it to offer.  But for some reason now, I do (I did ask for it??).  It felt like I was plugged into this powerful electrical current and it just flowed out.

Pure Love?

As I was going home, I wondered…is this love the pure love of God? Is this what I’ve resisted?  Or is this something else? And where do you get it? It manifested between people vs. something I could accomplish alone.  So, was God there through all of this directing it through me? Hmm, I wonder.

In general, I am the type of person to hold myself to a pretty high standard.  I don’t let myself off the hook.  I tend to replay things in my mind, wondering what I could have said better, done better, delivered better, etc.  What if receiving this kind of love is just really just an extension of forgiveness, and allowing myself to be open to receive?  Is it that easy?  I do tend to block my own self-forgiveness until I feel I’ve beat myself enough. Why do that when this is ready to be offered and just received?

Going beyond myself

Going beyond myself I started noticing others around me who are not receiving too.  It’s almost epidemic.  I’m fortunate to have a loving family, but each person I know has blockages around what they are willing to receive.  I started to notice that we put up walls to receive others love because we are busy judging them for what they have done/haven’t done.  “So and so didn’t do this, and that really bothers me.”  So, next time they saw So and So…they would hold that issue in between them, like opposing magnets.  While it’s not overt or obvious, an energetic block occurs.  So no matter how the other person felt, they could not share their love with that person holding the block, neither could that person receive it.

Let’s face it.  There are times when we desire to receive a certain type of response from someone else.  It could be forgiveness, mercy, hope, love.  You might find yourself thinking in your head..”Well they’ll just HAVE to understand.”  But what if they, historically in their life, have not been a recipient of compassion or understanding?  Are they really able to offer it to you? And if they do not, how do you react to that?  Is it your failing or theirs?

It’s really not about you after all

I hold the belief that how people react to me is 99% of the time based on issues they have vs. anything I’m doing.  But I also find that it’s hard to remember when I’m feeling hurt, rejected, and not receiving what I had hoped in return.  Well, perhaps it’s as simple as they can’t give what they themselves don’t have.  It’s really not about me after all.

So, then, who are we to judge? Ourselves or others? We’re all human trying to live our lives and be good people (for the most part).   Perhaps we should just try to learn how to love others around us and ignore that judgement voice inside.  Then perhaps we can offer something someone else needs, vs. what we need from them.  Pure love of God.  That’s all.

Image source

I read an article this morning from Andrea Conway, a law of attraction coach who shares a great perspective on LOA and how we can bring it into our lives, business, etc.  So this morning in her e-newsletter, she talks about how we can bring ourselves in better vibrational alignment with what we really want.  In her article, she suggested that like ordering a dessert, why would we order up a dessert from the menu of the universe and have it be something we don’t like?  She asks  “would you order strawberry rhubarb pie if you didn’t like it?”  Well, no..

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I love these kind of analogies because they make sense.  Our words, thoughts and desires are essentially placing vibrational orders to the universe, but then when the waitress comes, we want to send it back our order.  I’ve been there.  Andrea offers these thoughts, to help take ourselves off the hook.  She suggests we don’t really know we are doing it, it’s an unconscious thing:

It’s not always easy to accept that we’re vibrational matches to what we clearly do not want: a shortage of money, an illness, a difficult relationship. But denying our vibrational resonance to the situation only binds us to it more strongly.

If you can accept that whatever is in your life right now is a vibrational match to you, you’ve made a huge first step in using the circumstances you don’t like as springboards to something better.

So, I’m  taking a dose of this medicine right now in light of my new situation.  I will say that up to the point of my recent food allergy assessment, I had been ordering up (thinking, desiring) a way for me to make better food choices and help align my body with what it needs.  I also wanted to change my belief that weight loss is hard, and switch it around to weight loss is easy.  You know, challenging those limiting beliefs we hold, and cutting the polarization cord so I don’t keep bringing back situations I don’t want.

Andrea does offer some suggestions around acceptance which is the key to it all:

Acceptance is a way of pausing, clearing the slate, and starting afresh:

OK, universe, I accept that right now I am a vibrational match to these stale oatmeal cookies. But I declare that what I truly prefer to eat is the key lime pie.

The simple act of accepting what has happened and choosing again sets you on a new vibrational course.

Acceptance is a small step — so small that many people would dismiss it as too insignificant to matter. Yet, it is the entire key to shedding the resistance that binds you.

I guess I would have liked to “send back my order” of food allergies.  But as I’m accepting it all, I am noticing that there is no resistance, and weight loss is easier.  It’s just coming off, and I’m not thinking about it much.  I’m also not crazy hungry like I would be if I were “dieting” and thinking I could be having other things but I’m not.  The reality is, this is a new way of life.  It just is.  And by not fighting it, I’m gravitating toward re-discovering foods I have ignored or never had.

I like that part of it.  And I do feel better.  So, if I can realign myself there, where can I go next??   Seems like the field is wide open.

Have you experienced this before?

Photo Credit: www.kingshawaiian.com

This is a crazy time of year, life seems to be on warp speed around the holidays.  People drive more aggressive, Christmas lists gnaw the back of our minds (did I remember everyone??), and the Holiday Card lists linger as another thing to do before we celebrate.

But I do like to take this time of year to reflect back on how things went and see where I can make changes in 2009.  I set goals every year, and for the most part I do alright in meeting them.  But there are others that are more elusive and tend to stay on the list from year to year.  They include things like write a book, start up an online store, write in my blog daily (cough cough)…

But I do have a big finding this year.  The kind of finding that I think is pretty deep seeded,  and may have really big ripple effects moving forward.  So, my new realization is that I apologize alot.  I’m always saying “sorry”, even when I’m not really sorry.  I’m getting a bit irritated with myself.  Sorry, my cart is in the way; Sorry, you’re in my way;  Sorry, I’m next in line; Sorry, you dropped your pen; Sorry, Sorry, Sorry.  Being polite is one thing, this is entirely another.

What’s up with that? In fact, this is something that I do ALOT.  It’s really a bunch of nonsense and has to stop.  It’s almost like “I’m Sorry for being on this planet”.  Ummm, no, I’m really not.  And, I’m here to do some interesting things that require NO apology.

This all came to a head last week when I had a brief coaching session with Andrea Conway, who is very talented at lasering right in on a problem, no matter what direction I come at.  She helped me wake up a bit and recognize it for what it is, and what a huge blocker it is.

I think it started way long ago, back when I was a child and my brother (who I love dearly NOW) really didn’t appreciate my arrival into this world (as other sources say).  I spent alot of my childhood playing things down because I wanted his attention, and placated things so I could just get along in hostile territory.  Fast forward 40 years later, and I’m still apologizing for coming into the world.  Now that may be a big jump in logic, but I do find it interesting when I discover little things like this that end up being HUGE things to consider.  Things that have deep roots require a gentle, yet strong pull to get it all vs. rip it out like a dandelion and leave half the root in.

Now I’m onto this trend.  I was shopping this weekend and I noticed how many times my subconscious answer is “Sorry” or “I’m sorry”.  Now when I catch myself I feel myself getting pissed off that I was unable to stop my unconscious response.  My son has told me to stop saying that phrase when I’m driving and “motioning” to other drivers who are usually being complete idiots…they don’t deserve my apology for sure.

So 2009 is all about no apologies, no regrets.  I’m ready to move on.  It’s bagged and tagged.  All through.

I can’t wait to discover what else is in my deep dark closet of hidden habits that could deliver a new breakthrough.  I do think this is one of those discoveries that will continue to bear new fruits.  I have no idea how today, but the mystery is unfolding, and I look forward to sharing the insights here.

The soul excavation continues.   Until next time…

This time of year is always magical to me, the color and smell of the leaves, the deep blue skies, the crisp air, the crunch of leaves under my feet.  Fall is a time to let go, to release those leaves that no longer serve our purpose.  A time to get rid of all those attachments that aren’t really working out anymore.

There seems to be something going on at the underlayers of our thoughts and consciousness, and I wonder about the natural cycles that take place in our lives that we don’t necessarily relate to the seasons.  When we think about the American Indians, they lived their lives around nature and the seasons.  I find it hard to believe that those intuitive knowings have completely disappeared.   But, not to get too serious, yet stay in the spirit of letting go, I’ve put together my “Let-it-Go” list:

- The Saintly, come in under the radar,  Italian Veil of Guilt – I’m getting very good at seeing it coming cause I’ve been raised with the best of the best , but I am also known for throwing out a good guilt trip…

- Saying yes and pretending to comprehend a conversation even when I know I have no freaking clue because I’m not paying attention.  Usually I am interrupted while in the “business zone” as my son calls it…especially when he wants something, and I say “yes” just to get it done.   So far he’s tried to get several new video games, a new guitar, concert tickets, permission to do things he shouldn’t … all have been thwarted…so far.  It’s an on-going battle.

- Saying No – in so many dimensions – especially to the Fire and Police Associations who need help supporting the families of officers/firefighters who have died in the line of fire – how do you say no to that?  But really, I can’t swing it this time….

- Intentionally missing the “cooking window” for supper before announcing that “we haven’t had pizza in awhile”, which we all know is B.S.

It’s also time for renewal, planting for spring, and making room for a period of quiet gestation where things gather energy and prepare for emergence.  Then spring comes – and none too soon because I’m already feeling bitchy about the cold.  But, a little fertilizer doesn’t hurt during the quiet time, so here’s what I’ll tend to over the next few months, with the hopes of emerging in the spring with new habits:

- Reduce my ADD behavior online.  I’m all over the place.  I need to set up a schedule that forces me to close my email, Twitter, FriendFeed, and FB accounts.   Either that or someone will find me hunched over my computer frozen stuck reading the screen, typing endlessly to people who my husband calls “my friends” [emphasis on "friends"].  I need a better balance.

- Making time for me daily and not feeling guilty about it.  (talk to the hand)

- Not procrastinating everything – oops, wait a minute ….just kidding…

- Work up to lead guitar on Rock Band.   The rest of the band likes me just where I’m at…on bass   I won’t be pushed in the background anymore!  So there.  I may even grab the mic.

What about you? What are you “letting go” this season?  Tis’ the season to shed those leaves.  Would love to hear your thoughts.

I grew up hearing phrases like “Taking from Peter to pay Paul”, and “Money doesn’t grow on trees” and all that cultural anti-money noise many of us have heard in our families.

I decided awhile back that I didn’t want to buy into those messages anymore, so I began affirming my way to wealth.  Why? Because it seems that attitude puts money on the wrong end of the stick.  Small problem, however…affirming makes you feel good but doesn’t necessarily attract wealth.  That’s the problem with a pure affirmation play.

While I haven’t found the golden nugget, or the way to make millions in my sleep (and I’ve tried and still trying…), I hold the belief there is an easier way around all this.  And I know it has to do with my vibrations about money and the effort required to attract it.  I’m working on it…

It doesn’t help that the media continues to pound away at the “world is falling” message.  This upcoming election is really like no other that I can remember, it’s a complete 3 ring circus, with the media hogging the third ring.  To compound the problem, the Dow dropped another 500 points today, and I know its affecting everyone’s 401k.  I won’t even look. My Q3 statement came in and showed growth.  If I look now, it will not help me feel better at all so what’s the point.

So I’ve decided to take matters into my own hands.  I put together a no-BS cash flow budget that tracks just about every penny possible.   It’s hard to set at first, and is a real eye opener.  Gosh, I had no idea how much money our family was spending on pizza, and dining out.  Yikes…  And how much of the spending was unplanned, off the cuff, go to the ATM and get $100 type spending.   Not the way to operate, and not the way to run this household which supports more than my share of people.

So, my new budget has had benefits that I had not anticipated.  I also required going completely cold turkey on credit cards.  Not using any at all, for anything.  And breathe……. This was hard, but not as hard as breaking other habits I have…a-hem…   So, benefits include:

1.  I do have money, now that I know where it is.  Wow, who would have thought?

2.  The change in my purse really does come in handy…well most of the time as some can attest to my digging around to find change because I don’t want to break a bill…which leads to…

3.  I discovered I really hate breaking my large bills.  I like them big.  Love the Grant’s & Benjamins especially.

4.  I’m to the point where I care about how my cash bills “ride along” in my purse. All denominations are facing front, in the same direction, from highest to lowest.  I love them all, they all deserve respect.  This is as opposed to my old plan, crumpled up, some folded, stuffed everywhere, pockets, and such, never knowing where they all where.  I really think they like the new order of things, there seems to be more of them in there lately.

5.   My family constantly chirps “Is it in the budget?”  I take my 12 yr old son with me food shopping, he’s great for loading/unloading bags, and for those dispatches across the store for things I forgot. But last week we are checking out, and he’s watching the tally on the register.  “Mum, I think we’ll be in budget this time, that’s my guess.”  And sure enough we were.  These type of comments typically get large smiles from the cashier (if she’s older than 25), and from people behind me in line.  Which leads me to..

6.  It’s more about behavior modification than anything else.  Somehow the months come and go, and we make it work.  But a new mindset has me thinking like this now… “Do I really need this item”  And let me tell you, it was VERY HARD to walk thru the Patriot’s Pro Shop and buy nothing on Monday night.  It was a fight of will.  But we escaped bag-free. Phew..

7.  By taking matters in own hands, and being responsible with money leads to more money.  Strange, but true.  Not just found money in the budget, but I mean new income streams.  Sweetness…..

8.  It’s in my subconsious now.  I’ve had dreams talking about my cash plan to those in my dreams…this must be good, right???

I must give credit to Dave Ramsey, as he’s helped me on this path of goodness.  His plan works.  It’s not necessarily easy, but it works.

And I must say, there is nothing like having cash.  Cash works everywhere.  It’s really not like the debit card commercials, they just want you to think that way.

Until next time…