I was watching a TED video recently with Brene Brown where she talked about the power of vulnerability. The word “vulnerability” can make you shrink back… It’s uncomfortable, and can feel like a weakness. But, she noted that “Vulnerability is our most accurate measurement of courage”…. and “Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity and change.”
Brene discusses how our vulnerability brings connections with others. Empathy. Understanding. Love. Without it, we are a shadow of our true self – unable to really connect with another, to understand, to listen and just be there. Let’s face it, we all have moments in our life or parts of our life story we’d like to white out…and pretend that they are not there. But who are we fooling, really? It’s the becoming that makes us who we are, and not any individual event can totally represent our whole being.
In the past five months, I’ve felt nothing but vulnerable. And I’ve made some life changes that have brought me on a whole new path. It’s required me to let go. Let go of who I thought I was. This had to happen so I could allow myself to become who I can be…it’s still a work in progress.
And I’m still in full reassessment. I’ve started businesses that I’m not sure fit me anymore. I’ve ended a relationship that molded a good part of who I am, as well as who I want to be. I’m letting go pieces of myself. One piece at a time. Hoping to discover new pieces that are dark or unknown, or unable to surface without the letting go. It reminds me of gardening in a way. Some things have to die for new things to bloom. And let me be clear, it hurts to even type that, never mind live it. There is a blind faith that I cling to that things will turn out right. I believe God is walking with me on this path.
And as I listened to Brene, I heard my house phone ring. It’s a phone number I’ve had since I was 19, that’s moved with me from house to house. Strangely, I’m attached to it, it’s part of my identity. But I think it might be time to let that go too. Another piece. Another time. Another life.
At the same time of letting go is this newness, this incredible sense of possibility. Of what is to be.
I’ve been letting this post brew and now I’m feeling vulnerable. But I’ve always kept this blog a little raw and honest so…. I have also decided to shut down one of my businesses. I need to let it morph into the next thing, and letting it go is the only way.
Onward and upward my friends…
Here’s the video I mentioned: